Thursday, July 23, 2009

I Need Some Help Here...

Yesterday we had a visit from a Family Services Counselor from the mortuary where we buried Sophia & Ellie. The purpose of this visit was just to touch base with us, give us the deed to the girls' plot, and to give us some resources to help deal with our grief. the gentleman was very kind and compassionate and the visit went well and was brief.

After the counselor left, I looked through the information he gave us and saw that none if it pertained specifically to the loss of a child. I think losing a child has so many emotions that differ form that of losing another loved one. This kind of bothered me, so I made a phone call to this counselor today and asked him if he would like for me to put a list of resources together for future families who suffer the loss of a child. So that is what I am doing and that is where you come into this too...

If you have any books that you have read that have really helped you with your grief, would you please leave me a comment with the title and the author if known? Also, if there have been any online resources that you have felt have been particularly helpful, that information would be great as well.

I don't need this information for myself, but if I can make this horrible situation easier for just one more family, then I will feel a little bit better about the loss I am suffering.

Thanks for helping me out with this


  1. The Shack - william paul young
    Empty Cradle, Broken Heart -

  2. Tina, I am going to email you with a few links that I came across in doing some research.

  3. I love that you're doing that!

    I love, love, loved "An Exact Replica of A Figment of My Imagination." - A memoir of a woman who loses a child at birth. And, I also recommend, "The Blessing of Broken Heart."

    I'd also put the blog directory on there. It took me three whole weeks to find the blogs online. I think it's

  4. This is such a great thing to do. Visit Share's website. On there they have printable brochures on all subjects. They are wonderful resources.

    Hi there!! what a great thing to do and to make such a difference is so vital and important and in honour of your beautiful girls in a way on the link above and online publications that one of our major organisations here in Australia have put online, got some good resources and readings on bereavement etc.
    Wishing you gentle days and thinking of Sophia and Ellie

  6. I think that's a lovely idea! No suggestions, unfortunately - I tried Empty Cradle and some other book. . . but I was too jacked up to even try to read them until it was too late to matter! What did help a lot was just digging in and reading your all's blogs. . .

  7. Something that really helped me are these things:


    "Good Grief", "Peace, Perfect Peace", I don't know the authors right now. But I will get them to you.


  8. Love what you're doing!!!
    Some of my favorites were-
    "I'll hold you in heaven" by Jack Hayford (This is a Christian author)
    and for siblings of an angel baby there is an AWESOME picture book called, "We were gonna have a baby, but we had an angel instead" by Pat Schwiebert
    Your babies lives are certainly helping so many other families- What you're doing is amazing!

  9. I LOVE "We were gonna have a baby, but we had an angel instead" (as much as one can love a book about their baby dying.) I was given this book, along with many others, from Social Services when I was in the hospital. The second I saw it, I knew this is how I would explain to Emma where her little sisters are. (Now I'm crying...)

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  11. one wonderful book (although not expressly about baby loss) is: A Grace Disguised by Jerry Sitser.

    Another good one is: When Bad Things Happen to Good People...(also not specifically for baby loss, but it helped me A LOT).

    I also like Empty Cradle, Broken Heart and Pregnancy After A Loss.

  12. First, I want to tell you how sorry I am for your loss ... losing a child (or two as in your case) is by far one of the worst things in life. My heart goes out to you and your family. I wish you much strength as you walk through your grief journey. Second, what a great thing you are doing for others! As a few others mentioned I found some comfort in Empty Cradle, Broken Heart. I also find much peace and comfort in reading other babyloss parent's experiences at the website Glow in the Woods (

  13. "The Christmas Box" and "The Christmas Box Miracle". About a man who befriends the old woman next door only to discover she has lost a child and kept a memory box. She mourns her loss at the base of an angel statue, and when it's destroyed, she becomes a lost soul. He then went on to erect statues throughout the US dedicated to all the lost children...our angels.